New Super Mario Brothers Wii comes out next month.  It's a semi-sequel to New Super Mario Brothers DS.

So...that means you can call it the new New Super Mario Brothers game.

Nintendo recommends that you buy the game when it comes out, instead of waiting a few months and buying it used.  So...basically, they're saying you should buy a new new New Super Mario Brothers.

...Right...

Sad news: Captain Lou Albano, famous for his work with musician Cyndi Lauper, his career as a participant and manager in the world of wrestling, and his role as Mario on The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, passed away today at the age of 76. I understand that he was in declining health and was recently placed in hospice care, but no specific cause of death has yet been given.

For me, Captain Lou WAS and IS Mario. I grew up watching The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, and even though nowadays I laugh at how bad the show was at times, there's nobody else I'd rather have delivering those delightfully cheesy lines.

We'll miss you, Captain Lou. In honor of his memory, please join me in doing "The Mario," one last time.

And try not to laugh too hard when he almost falls over at the end.

Speaking of Mario Kart...

With surprisingly elaborate costumes and props!

So much for not caring about it's loyal fanbase! Actually, by releasing yet another iteration of one of its portable consoles, one could argue that Nintendo is further not caring about its loyal fanbase by forcing them to shell out another two hundred bucks or be behind the times, but that would just put a damper on their announcement.

Like probably a lot of people, I've recently bought, played, and beaten Mario RPG on the Wii's Virtual Console. And it left me with a question: Is Mario's quest a worthwhile quest?
Well, here's how I see it. The game tries to put forth the idea that people's wishes will never ever come true if the Star Road isn't rebuilt; but that's clearly not true, because people can still make their wishes come true themselves. If someone wishes for a shiny new mushroom, now they won't just be given a shiny new mushroom---now they'll have to actually go out and get their shiny new mushroom themself.

But why is that a bad thing?

I think the world could stand to live without the Star Road for a while, get people to really work for what they want to achieve. Maybe the results of their wishes would give them greater joy that way, or maybe they'd just learn to be a little more independent and self-sufficient.

Unless it's a wish that literally isn't possible for someone to achieve on their own, e.g., "I wish I could grow a pair of wings and fly." Here, I'm not sure if I know enough about the Mario RPG universe---does the Star Road allow for impossible wishes to be granted? If so, maybe that gives it a little more purpose.

Fact: Politicians cannot play video games for beans.

Connecticut Senator Gayle Slossberg (D) is now looking for gamers to help her reach the "Rape Scene" within Grand Theft Auto IV. Slossberg stated in an inverview with The New Haven Advocate that she finds this scene quite the negative impact in raising our children, and is going to use the "Rape Scene" to fuel her arguement in getting better warning labels placed on game boxes. Or rather, she would use the scene, if only she had the ability to make it that far in the game.

Senator, you clearly aren't tring hard enough. I got to the Rape Scene not 15 minutes into the game! I mean come on! All you do is punch out an army of cops, get the rest of your Mexicans Buddies across the border, kill a baby, go bowling with your cousin, and then you get to the Rape Scene! I mean, really now! I know you have little time on your hands, what with your ultra-special political voodoo you need to perform to get through daily life, but the least you can do is find the infomation you need to make your arguements valid! I mean, if you're not raping someone within an hour of gameplay, you really have no hope as a gamer, much less a human being.

Mario, travelling on a Yacht? What an elitest bastard. He'll never become president.

Nintendo released today its summer lineup of titles in North America. In addition to the forthcoming Super Mario Sluggers (which out a major media blowout at GameTrailers yeserday), and some... hidden picture... thing... Two other titles, Wario Land: Shake It, and Kirby Super Star Ultra were revealed to be a part of the lineup as well. While I've never been much of a Kirby fanatic, I can safely tell you, with all of my manlyness in check, THAT I AM PISSING MY PANTS IN EXCITEMENT FOR A NEW WARIO LAND. YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE WARIO LAND 4? SEVEN LONG YEARS.

There really is a god, after all.

Finally, tonight, there's a nice little freebie for you Gutiar Hero III players on the PS3 and 360 tomorrow. Even though the merger between Antivision and Blizzard is still months away, the engaged couple are still exchanging gift to each other to make their comming union all the more special. Level 70 Elite Tauren Chieftain's "I Am Murloc" will be the third cross-franchise music to be featured in GHIII. (If you've been keeping track, themes from Halo and God of War have already been offered as freebies to GHIII players. In addition, "Still Alive", from Portal, was added to Rock Band as well.) While I have absolutely no idea what this theme actually sounds like since I tend to stray away from World of Warcraft like a fat kid avoids carrots, I do love my free downloadable content, and everyone knows my sexual lust for crossovers. The day we find Guitar Axes in WOW is both very near and quite far off.